Accountability Partners 3-2-1

Last time I brought up for consideration the subject of adding an accountability partner in addition to an accountability group to aid in achieving goals. This time let’s look at a way to keep the phone calls with your accountability partner short and on target. I like 15 minute phone calls... anything more and my ear starts to hurt, and I have other calls to make. Remember the goal of these phone calls with your accountability partner is to keep you on task toward fulfilling your goals. If you take five minutes and your accountability partner takes five minutes, then with a little chit-chat you’ll be done in 15 minutes.  

Keeping to 3-2-1 as a model will help you stay on schedule.

   3 - Accomplishments

   2 - Goals

   1 - More thing

 

Just like accountability groups the focus is on accomplishments from the last phone call and goals for next time. I like starting with what I accomplished; this helps keep things on a positive note. Tell your accountability partner what top three things you’ve accomplished. Even if you accomplished ten things of note, mention three. This is a quick report and you don’t want to use up your whole five minutes.

After accomplishments move on to your top two goals for today. Saying your goal, or the activity to bring about that goal, out loud to someone has real power to energize your day. Normally, you’ll have more than two things you want or need to accomplish that day, but stating the top two creates clarity in your day. This is also motivating for those things you are less than excited get started on. One of my least favorite, but most important tasks every day is 10 to 15 phone calls to contacts and prospects.

Then move on to one more thing.  This can really be anything you want your accountability partner to be aware of. I might mention something I’m excited about or grateful for. “I have a phone call today with Wendy and I’m looking forward to the progress she is making on her project.” After this one more thing, it’s time for your accountability partner to talk and for you to listen.

After your accountability partner is finished, it’s good to confirm your next phone call or face to face meeting. If you’re doing this in coordination with an accountability group, then you’ll be prepared to report your weekly successes and accomplishments to the group. This will reinforce your activity and efforts with your accountability partner. REMEMBER: This is a tool not a time consuming activity so a little chit-chat to start and to end the session is fine but keep it short and simple

Happy Passover, Happy Easter

Job search can be compared with the Exodus of the Israelites. You’re in a desert walking without any sign of the promised land. It may even seem like 40 years you’ve been in transition. It may seem like that yet, more and more people are finding jobs and winning the interview and getting job offers.

In the last seven days I’ve worked with five clients regarding salary negotiations and heard back about three others landing and starting new jobs. Passover reminds us that there is a reward at the end of our suffering. Sometimes we never could imagine what lies at the end of our journey.

That reminds me of the old joke about the Priest stopping in Sister Mary Margaret’s religion class. Fr. O’Brien asks, “Sister may I ask the children some questions about Easter. “Why sure Father, we would be proud to show you how well we’ve learned our lessons, wouldn’t we children?” The children all nodded. So Fr. O’Brien asks, “Could someone tell me what happened on the first Easter?”

One girl up front, Maureen Collins quickly raised her hand and said, “Oh yes, Father, that was when Jesus came into the world.” Both the priest and the nun were dismayed. “No, my dear,” said the priest, “that was Christmas day.” Then another child, a girl named Katy raised her hand and said, “Was that when God invented the Easter Egg Father?” Shaking his head he said, “No, Katy, not at all...” “Surely Sister, you’ve covered the Feast of Easter in class!”

Sister, rather embarrassed said, “Class we discussed this just last week, remember!” The children were all sitting in their seats, looking puzzled. And then finally, with a bit of hesitation Tommy Malloy raised his hand. Quietly he said, “Father, that was a Sunday Morning, eh?” Fr. O’Brien said, “Yes, Tommy, go on...” And Tommy said, “And there was this cave with a great stone in front of the opening...” “Go on Tommy,” the priest said.  “And the stone was rolled away and the Lord Jesus came out of the cave...” “Yes Tommy,” the priest and the nun prodded the lad on in unison.

“Oh, yes, Father, the Lord Jesus came out of the cave, looked around and saw his shadow and we get six more weeks of bad weather! Is that right Father?” said a very proud Tommy Malloy.

Hopefully you’re smiling now.

In Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl comments that we can endure as long as we know that we have someone in our corner. What the holy days of Passover and Easter reminds us that we can have hope. That if we are people of faith, our God is with us. If we have family or friends we have people who love us. And regardless of how long you’ve been looking for work, you can and will find a job.

Shalom and good Passover and/or Happy Easter, Pax Vobiscum

Job 1: Get Them to Like You

In job search there are two things that are essential when you are in the interview. Everything you do up to that point needs to support those two aspects. First and most importantly in the interview process you really need the interviewer to like you. Ask yourself, why do people hire people? To solve problems and or to get things done are the most common answers. Then ask yourself why do they hire one person over another?

It’s not whether your qualifications are better than the other candidates; those things are screened out prior to the interview. One person may have some talents that another doesn’t have, but then the other may also have unique talents that the former doesn’t. So all things being equal, when you get to the interview it’s no longer about your capability; it’s most likely about you and how you’ll fit. In other words, how well do they like you. I’ve never hired someone because I liked them least among the candidates.

I’m not saying that the hiring process is a popularity contest, but in some ways -- important ways, you need to think in those terms when you are in a job search. Some of my clients come to me discouraged because they haven’t landed a job and have had numerous interviews. When we peel back the interviews, they says things like: “But I’m perfect for the job!” or “I gave the perfect answer...” It seems that while they are spending a fair amount of energy on giving the response that is just right, they may be missing the opportunity to make a favorable impression.

From the first handshake, you are there to present yourself as a professional. As someone who can solve their problems, do the work they need done. You need to fit into their organization, their team and be seen as someone who could work one-on-one with them. They are not looking for someone who will cause trouble or problems. One of my favorite managers use to say, “most technical problems are preceded by people problems.” It’s true. Communication problems lead to product defects; it’s probably the number one cause, but that’s a subject for another blog. So the more they like you, the less problems you are likely to present when you are working together.

Being liked is only the first step in the interview; the hiring manager is looking to validate your experiences that you cited in your resume. How you go about giving that validation is the next step in the process. We’ll talk more about this in a later posting. But for now, just remember that you can greatly improve your chances in an interview by remembering to be a friendly, confident professional. 

Hope is a Choice and Faith is the Answer.

I remember a friend was once in the situation where he’d lost his job and time was running out. He had to move out of his house. At the time he had a pregnant wife and three little kids. Their house was all packed up into their car and a U-Haul truck. They had nowhere to live.

Now my friend is a man of much deeper faith that I, and he was confident that everything would turn out okay. In fact, he had a phone interview that morning which was the third and deciding interview with a prospective employer. He made the phone call to an Episcopal Church in Elkhart, IN, from a phone booth looking out at the truck and car.

The interview went well and they offered him the job and told him how much it paid. They asked when he could start and if there was anything they could do to assist him in the transition. He said that he could start tomorrow and could they tell him if they knew of anywhere he might stay for the night. He said he was all packed and would be in Elkhart in about 4 to 5 hours.

They agreed to meet at the church and they would work something out when he arrived. While he was on the road, two parish members called the church and told the Rector that they needed to leave town that an emergency had occurred; that they needed to leave right away for six to eight weeks. Could someone watch their house for that time? The Rector said that the new Youth Pastor was arriving in town in a few hours and needs a place to stay for awhile...

When my friend arrived in Elkhart, he was met by this couple who were packed and ready to head out of town. They greeted the new Youth Pastor, met his family and gave them keys to the house and directions to get there. They thanked each other and praised God's for his grace & blessings. My friend, his pregnant wife and three kids drove to a storage complex where they were met by 10 parishioners who help them unpack the U-Haul. They then drove to their temporary home, overlooking the river. They got settled and were taken to a welcome party at the home of another parishioner who would become their very best friends.

They eventually found a house to buy which was a real fixer-upper. That wasn’t the end of their troubles and trials, nor was it the end of their blessings and joys. So what’s the point? Chose to be hopeful; have faith and trust because when all seems hopeless something good will happen. It may not stay but then something else good will happen.

F. U. Interviews

Bev Rautenberg

I have a client that always reminds me that I was the first to tell her to F. U. I’m always a tad nonplussed when she says this until I remember that F. U. is not an expletive.

Following Up (F. U.) after interviews is one of the more neglected aspects of a job search. Some research have cited 60% of job seekers fail to follow up after the interview. Client’s have told me...  “They said they would be making a decision is two weeks I’ll check in then.” Other’s say, “I don’t want to look too desperate.” And still others say, “The ball’s in their court, if they want me they’ll call me.” Sitting by the phone waiting for the phone to ring is a sad and lonely task. “But the interview went very well; I thought I hit a home run. Why haven’t they called? Maybe I should call them, but it’s been too long for me to follow up now!”

Following up is sometimes scary for the job seeker. “What if they tell me that I didn’t get the job?” or “I don’t know what to say.” So what if they tell you that they decided to go a different direction! Is that really bad? Sure, it doesn’t feel good to be told you didn’t get the job, however, two things are available for the job seeker if they give you this message.

First, express your disappointment, and wish them success with their choice. Then ask if they know of anything else that could utilize someone with your skills and abilities. “Gee, I’m sorry to hear that I didn’t get the job; I wish you success with the person you selected. You and I spent enough time together that I’m wondering if you would know of any other opportunities that could utilize someone with my experience and talents?”

Second, the job seeker can continue to create networking opportunities and follow up with other job leads. Just because you have an interview doesn’t mean that you will land the job. Having several so called irons in the fire allows you to relax a little. If you get a no, you have something else to follow up on. It’s just one more no which brings you closer to the yes. The sales adage goes, you have to get through the nos to get to the yeses. “So I’ve got another no, yea!!! I’m that much closer to the job offer.” Maybe that sounds a little Pollyannaish, but that really is the right attitude to have in times like today.

Success comes out of persistence and constancy. Doing what you need to do and staying the course when you meet defeat or disappointment is the path to success. Thomas Edison once said, “Many of life's failures are men who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” So even though you’ve not heard back from the interviewer or the HR rep; don’t quit and give up. Call them back with a positive expectation that you’re the right candidate... it may be that they are too busy because they don’t have you on their team.

The coach says, keep  following up (F. U.) until you get a definite yes or no.

"Buzz Words" or Headlines?

There are loads of blog postings, articles and news stories regarding the use of buzz words in your résumé and other job search documents. These postings tell the job seeker that, some “Buzz Words are Bad!” Using phrases like, “team player,” “detail oriented,” “results oriented,” and “problem solver” are examples of word that are overused and need to removed from a résumé. But what if I am an excellent problem solver? What if as a QA/QC professional I have excellent attention to detail? Do I not say these things.

About a year ago, an article was published on CBS regarding Résumé Buzz Words that needed to be in your résumé. And around that same time an LinkedIn Blog posting identified ten buzz words that could hurt your job search.  Now here is where it gets confusing for job seekers: some of these words are in both lists.

If you think about what these folks are trying to say, the idea is that the job seeker needs to move beyond the cliché. However, I am a team builder and problem solver. Is that a cliché? Or is it a headline? Read this morning’s newspaper if you still get one. Or read an “on line” paper like The Patch and I defy you to find a single story without a headline.

Headlines are meant to grab the reader’s attention... so that you’ll move deeper and read the article, get the whole story. This is also what the résumé buzz words are intended to do. They get the reader to dig deeper into the résumé and read about your skills, abilities and accomplishments.

In the job interview, just like the résumé you need to catch the interviewer’s attention and then share the success stories that prove the statements you made in your résumé. I think that a Buzz Word is a cliché only when it isn’t followed up with a good, solid success story with a strong result at the end.

Yes, some buzz words are over used in résumés and in other marketing material. And some buzz words are more descriptive than others. So, if all you use are overused and cliché buzz words, and you have no concise story proving your assertion, then you need to do some work. But buzz words are important, especially when employers are using Key Word Search tools to screen your résumé and cover letter.

Use Wordle or other Word Cloud applications to see what words are most prevalent in your resume and cover letter. In fact, write out your elevator speech and run that through Wordle and see if the most common words appear on the overused list. If not then don’t worry about the words your are using, because the only bad words not to be used in a résumé are the ones George Carlin made famous years ago.

Having Hope In Job Search

I was speaking to a group of job seekers the other day and I offered them a prophetic statement that someday down the road they’d all have jobs and there would be no more unemployment and then I’d be out of work. There was loud discord from the group, a collective, “Yea, Right! What are you smoking?”  

I understand the group’s reaction; the news about the economy is so dark and dismal, how could I express anything so silly as a world without unemployment? Even a rate of 4% is next to impossible to envision. Yet, there was one person back in the far corner said, “No, you’ll still have work; folks will need someone to help them grow in their career beyond their new job.”

This person had hope. There are people out there who realize that “Yes, we can” is more than a campaign slogan and that we live in a world were anything is possible, but, and this is a big but, nothing will happen without the expectation that it will happen. Having hope is having an expectation that something will change, something will be different, something will be better.

Often when we are suffering from some tragedy or trauma, like a mass layoff resulting in job loss, someone comes along an--whether out of ignorance or a total lack of tact--says something trite. “Buck up, Charlie, you’ll have a job in no time.” Or “Sorry to hear that you’re unemployed, I wish I could help but we’re not hiring at my company.” Recently a 45 year-old Electrical Engineer told me that after two months in job search someone said to him, “Hey, they’re hiring at the Seven-11.”

Folks going through job transition often report that after the first weeks of not having a job that they feel they’ve been tainted. People feel isolated, like they caught a communicable disease or something. Then when they’re feeling the pressure of the job search someone says, “Anyone who really wants a job can get one.” Or “Those people who have been unemployed for over a year are lazy...”

Corporate America is sitting on a bunch of money; some estimates go as high as a Trillion Dollars (that’s 1012 or $1,000,000,000,000.00). Companies across the country are running lean and mean and people with jobs report fatigue and frustration with the amount of work they have to do, and that the pressure is building. They report that the unemployment rate is as stressful on their lives as for those unemployed, maybe more. (My clients find this hard to believe.) But, the pressure is real and something has to give. Everyone is waiting for the shoe to drop.

Let’s have the hope, the expectation that companies will start hiring, slowly at first,  then with greater urgency and gusto. Let’s have the expectation that consumers will begin to consume more and consume more wisely. Then, folks will then be able to pay off their debt and even start saving. And then, there will be no more unemployment and I’ll be working only with folks looking to grow in their career. Let’s have hope!

Loving Yourself Through Positive Self Talk

My client said to me, “You probably don’t what to hear this...” and then went on to say something negative. I told my client that it’s not about me; I don’t what my clients thinking anything negative like that. It amazes me the negative things we tell ourselves... the negative way we talk to ourselves.

We’d never say to a stranger the things we say to ourself. Think about it... Someone locks their keys in their car and what do they say verbally or silently, “God, I am so stupid, I’m such an idiot... I cannot believe the stupid things I do. I’m surprised I can even walk upright...”  You’d never say that to a stranger. Can you imagine walking up to a little granny sitting on a park bench and saying those same things, “You are so stupid... you’re an idiot... I cannot believe all the stupid things you do...”  In fact, next time you see a Brian Urlacher walk up to him and  say, wait... never mind; but you see my point. You just wouldn’t talk that way, not to a grandma nor to a middle linebacker for the Chicago Bears.

Why do we talk so hurtfully to ourselves? Why do we offer acquaintances and strangers more words of encouragement than we do our own selves? Maybe the why isn’t as imperative to understand as the point that we should stop treating ourselves so badly and treat everyone, including ourselves as if they were your sweet dear ol’ grandmother.

We’re human and we make mistakes: give yourself a break. Why not say to yourself, “I’m getting better and better.” Or, “Today I’m better than I was yesterday, but not as good as I will be tomorrow.” Why? Because it corny, hoaky, or because people don’t really talk that way. Why not? I think it’s about time we start telling ourselves nice things. Start lifting ourselves up and forgiving ourselves for little mistakes. The next time you make a mistake say to yourself, “Wow, I normally remember to take my keys out of the ignition before locking and closing the door. I’m probably trying to do too much, too fast. I’ll slow down and think more clearly.” Isn’t that a much better thing to hear than in insult to your intelligence?

Showing yourself a little love, by way of saying something nice to yourself isn’t all that crazy. When you think about it like that, it sounds like good idea. At first say these things silently to yourself and after some time saying nice, positive things try saying it out loud. Really, it works.

I had a habit of leaving one thing downstairs when I went to bed at night. I’d mutter to myself down the steps, then back up the steps. One night I let myself off the hook and laughed at myself and said positive things to myself as I retrieved the forgotten item. A few days later, I realized that I wasn’t forgetting things downstairs at bedtime. What do you think, maybe there is a connection there? Give it a try yourself. Show yourself some love. Plus, your job search will benefit from the positive self talk.

More: Don’t take things personally

I’ve pointed out many times in talks, coaching session and in this blog that we have control over two things in this world. First, we have control over our attitude--namely, what we want our attitude to be. Second, we have control over our behavior--namely, how we act toward the world around us.

On the job or in a job search this is no less true. When something happens at work, from losing a promotion to getting a notice of termination, you are faced with what famed psychotherapist Albert Ellis, Ph.D. called an “Activating Event.” These events are without emotion, they simply are a fact one has to deal with. How we perceive these events, Ellis would say, is influenced by our “Belief System” which can be either rational or irrational.

I believe that if you get a pink slip at work a rational belief system would hold that your termination isn’t personal. In major lay offs where there is a 10%, 20% or even 30% reduction in force, it’s a numbers game, and your specific case probably has more to do with your salary or where you sit on an Org Chart than it is about who does or doesn’t like you. To quote The Godfather again: (Sonny Corleone to Tom Hagen and his brother Michael) “You're taking this very personal. Tom, this is business and this man is taking it very, very personal.”

What if your boss doesn’t respond to an email you sent? Don’t take it personally until he tells you so. For example: A job seeker and LinkedIn user wrote:  I have 55 first-level connections on LinkedIn, but 50 outstanding invitations that I have sent to people whom I have previous connections and relationships with, and yet they don't even bother to reply to my invitation. I am not sure if these folks are just not interested in LinkedIn anymore, or if they aren't interested in me anymore. Any suggestions???

And I responded: Remember not to take this or anything in your job search personally. There could be a 100 different reasons why these folks haven't replied. You've thought of two. Instead of playing a guessing game, follow up with an email or better yet a phone call. Reconnect and find out...

Life is filled with too many situations, events and accidents to believe that they are all focused on you. Give yourself a break, free yourself of the worry and stress of taking things personally. You’ll be happier and you’ll sleep better at night.

Vacations and Time Off

  The military call it R&R (Rest and Retraining or Relaxation) and others call it time off. In England they call it going on holiday and here we say going on vacation. Steven Covey in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People poses the question, how many people lie on their deathbed wishing they had spent more time in the office?

  We need to recharge our batteries and refill our gas tanks from time to time or we won’t have anything to give to others or to the job. It’s important to take care of ourselves especially when we are doing stressful work. And job search can be extremely stressful. It makes sense to take care of yourself, don’t overdo it. Work effectively and take time to relax and rejuvenate. 

  Saying that, coaches and consultants need to recharge their batteries too. So I’m going to take my own advice and I’ll be on vacation this week. Have a great week.

 

Almost all the Time It's Great Being a Coach

To quote my friend, Terry Sharipo, Ph.D. "It's nice to be a dad.   Almost all the time!"  And, I find this to be true. The times it's not great to be a dad are when you're kids may be in danger, when they are out of our control, when they do things that could put them in harms way. The thought of losing a child is a parents worse fear. 


But, it is the greatest feeling seeing your kids succeed, grow and thrive. The same thing is true in my role as career coach. When my clients are thriving, growing and succeeding; I'm on top of the world. But, when they are struggling, failing and feeling depressed; it's a tough job.


Most of the time it's great being a coach... mostly because I know that beyond the struggles there will be growth, beyond the depression my clients will thrive and out of the failings come success! 

Job lose really SUCKS, (excuse my profaneness) but no one every says, thank goodness I got sacked! Even if you hate your job, no one feels good about being between jobs. But, being a coach and working with hundreds and hundreds of people has afforded me the perspective to know if a client keeps working at what I'm teaching, they'll land a job. I cannot predict when, but I know they'll land.


This is my wish for all you who are not where you want to be in your career. Regardless if you are not employed, under-employed or looking for the next step in your career growth at a company; my you stay positive and believe and work your tail off... and you'll get there!

Happy Father's Day

Words to Grow Your Career

Some words are more than they appear...

A few years ago I was listening to a friend of mine give a presentation. Joe Takash is a motivational speaker and founder of Victory Consulting. Joe describes himself as a Behavior Strategist. He threw out an acronym that night that stuck with me. “SHE is the Key” he said! “Yes, SHE is the Key to making a great first impression.” SHE is an acronym for Smile, Handshake, Eye contact. When you are nervous meeting people for the first time remember SHE is the Key! I’ll never forget it and when I share this little device with friends and clients (always giving Joe the credit, of course) they always comment on just how cool SHE is, and that it works.

I have SHE is the Key on my whiteboard in my office and some of my colleagues thought that they would have some fun and put some other words on the whiteboard and we started creating acronyms from them. The words were:

• GOLF
• POTS
• EARS
• NOSE
• TOES
• FROG
• LAMP

Out of those we came up with:

Golden Opportunity Looking Forward  or 
Golden Opportunity Leading Forward
Put On The Suit
Enthusiasm + Action + Rapport = Success  or  
Excellent Appearance Reaps Success
Networking Organization Salesmanship Excellence!!!
Totally Open Enthusiasm Sells
Feelings Rock Our Group or 
Foster Relationships & Opportunities Grow!!! 
(You could leap into a Job)
Learn Achieve Master Passion

Looking at the acronyms you quickly realize that they all have a career focus or theme. And a number of our clients told us that they took the messages from the words to heart. For example, one client who doesn’t feel comfortable “dressing up” said that when he saw POTS, he thought it was meant just for him. He put on the suit. He had a great interview because he had his EARS on.

Thanks to my friends and colleagues, without them my job would be much harder and no where as much fun. Blessings to you, Sharon, Ann and Nancy... you're all Gr8!