Almost all the Time It's Great Being a Coach

To quote my friend, Terry Sharipo, Ph.D. "It's nice to be a dad.   Almost all the time!"  And, I find this to be true. The times it's not great to be a dad are when you're kids may be in danger, when they are out of our control, when they do things that could put them in harms way. The thought of losing a child is a parents worse fear. 


But, it is the greatest feeling seeing your kids succeed, grow and thrive. The same thing is true in my role as career coach. When my clients are thriving, growing and succeeding; I'm on top of the world. But, when they are struggling, failing and feeling depressed; it's a tough job.


Most of the time it's great being a coach... mostly because I know that beyond the struggles there will be growth, beyond the depression my clients will thrive and out of the failings come success! 

Job lose really SUCKS, (excuse my profaneness) but no one every says, thank goodness I got sacked! Even if you hate your job, no one feels good about being between jobs. But, being a coach and working with hundreds and hundreds of people has afforded me the perspective to know if a client keeps working at what I'm teaching, they'll land a job. I cannot predict when, but I know they'll land.


This is my wish for all you who are not where you want to be in your career. Regardless if you are not employed, under-employed or looking for the next step in your career growth at a company; my you stay positive and believe and work your tail off... and you'll get there!

Happy Father's Day

Holidays, Job Search and the Blues

One of the hardest things I have to do when I am working with someone in job search is supporting them through the blues. Especially when the blues is really depression. I work with a counselors and psychologist and if I suspect that someone is dealing with more than the blues I refer them to seek professional help.

The Mayo Clinic cites the following as symptoms of depression:

• Feelings of sadness or unhappiness
• Irritability or frustration, even over small matters
• Loss of interest or pleasure in normal activities
• Reduced sex drive
• Insomnia or excessive sleeping
• Changes in appetite — depression often causes decreased appetite and weight loss, but in some people it causes increased cravings for food and weight gain
• Agitation or restlessness — for example, pacing, hand-wringing or an inability to sit still
• Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
• Indecisiveness, distractibility and decreased concentration
• Fatigue, tiredness and loss of energy — even small tasks may seem to require a lot of effort
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or blaming yourself when things aren't going right
• Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
• Frequent thoughts of death, dying or suicide
• Crying spells for no apparent reason
• Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches

For someone going through transition due to a job loss some of these symptoms are normal and natural... but when these symptoms persist and even grow stronger action is called for. Counseling is one of the most important actions a person can take. Some folks will require medication in addition to counseling and there is nothing wrong with that. I’m amazed the number of folks who will routinely take cold or flu medicine but balk when depression medication is suggested.

Acute and chronic depression is a real disease that people are suffering from. Like the flu, cancer or a broken leg, depression is a medical condition that requires medical / psychological attention.  Psychologist tell us that the holidays are a difficult time for all of us, many people feel depressed during this time of year.  Even Elvis sung about a “Blue Christmas” and bouts of the Blues are understandable especially in our current economy.

From a career standpoint, I teach a “first things first” strategy. If you’re looking for a job you’d better develop a professional resume. Likewise, if you’re suffering from depression you need to deal with that before you’ll be able to do well in a job search. Just in the amount of energy required to conduct a professional job search, a depressed person will lag behind his or her competition. A job search requires a positive attitude; as one colleague says, “A job seeker has to have the enthusiasm of a puppy when the door bell rings!” I don’t know how someone can do that when they do not have the energy get out of bed, little less make 10 phone calls.

My hope is this, if you are feeling down and are demonstrating some or many of the symptoms listed above, contact your doctor for a proper depression screening. Seek out a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist and get the proper treatment to help you get ready for a job search or career change.

Would you hire yourself?

  I recently gave a talk where I posed the question which is the title of this blog entry. The question leads one to access what is unique about oneself. What are my strengths? What do I do which people would consider me an expert? Above and beyond this is the question; once I get noticed as the special and unique person I  am, how do I get a job offer? 

“There is a real magic in enthusiasm. It spells the difference between mediocrity and accomplishment.”  

  Dr. Norman Vincent Peale makes a point that we should revisit on a regular basis and constantly remind ourselves. I've often said, all things being equal or near equal, the hiring manager will hire the person they like best. Among all the things that makes us most likable is enthusiasm. An enthusiastic person is most likely to make a more favorable impression than a pragmatist or a pessimist.

  There are other benefits to being enthusiastic too. Enthusiasm builds energy in us. When we are more enthusiastic we are more creative. We are quicker to see and seize on opportunities. However when we are filled with fear or feel defeated due to our job search it feels like we have no energy or joy. We're flat as a cold  pancake. This is the worst place to be when seeking a new job.

 
  So if you are feeling down, depressed and/or bored... You need to pump yourself up. One of the questions from that workshop was, "How do you stay positive when you've been over a year looking for a job?"

  The answer is a difficult one and really depends on the person asking the question. For some people who may be clinically depressed they need to see their doctor or a psychotherapist and seek professional assistance. Regardless of the treatment, medication or therapy or both, fixing this needs to be a priority. A successful job search is nearly impossible if you're suffering from depression. 

  If you're not suffering from depression there are other things you can do to pump yourself up. Read a good book, something spiritual or inspiring. Listen to professional speakers on tape or CD; people like Zig Ziggler, Denis Waitley, or Stedman Graham. Listen to positive radio or internet radio broadcasts. For example, Joe Takash of Victory Consulting does an internet broadcast for VoiceAmerica Business <link> or there is Joy Maguire-Dooley's radio show Job Talk on AM 1530 broadcast out of WJJG in Elmhurst, IL. 

  In order to be positive at a difficult time in your life, you have to put positive things into your brain by reading, watching and listening. Be around positive people and run away from negative people with "stinkin' thinking" attitudes. Stay away from the evening news; even NPR which has loads of positive stuff, still has stories that will bring you down when you need to be pumping yourself up.  

  Finally, exercise, a balanced diet and sleep are essential to good physical and mental health. If your body is out of wack you'll not deliver the message you want when meeting with people. If you are sleep deprived it's hard to be enthusiastic. If you're in physical pain you'll be distracted and miss opportunities to shine.